Ongoing Process

Living out an incarnation within relativity carries quite a catch: ignorance. So long as we’re inhabiting a relative perspective, there will always be things we can’t see. No matter what we do or how enlightened we get, there will always be questions unanswered, understandings incomplete, and options oblivious.

Now, this wouldn’t necessarily be such a big deal except that ignorance hurts. Aside from the endless multitudes of mundane pain that ignorance will inevitably bring us, there is also a deeper suffering. The very state of being limited to a single point of reference carries its own innate tension, which is everywhere and all the time. It’s sort of like our bodies are a few sizes too small and we can never quite get comfortable in them.

The more sophisticated of our collective wisdom fully recognizes this and says the trick is to accept it. “Samsara is Nirvana”, as the saying goes. As soon as we stop fighting the unalterable reality of our own limitations, then within that very confinement we find an incredible freedom. Or that’s the theory, at least.

I get rather stuck at that point. See, I’m damned angry about the whole squished-into-a-body thing. I completely resent any and all ignorance or limitation. In fact, the freedom to object to my captivity feels like the one true freedom I have. I feel like giving that up would be giving up the only thing I have left that I can truly call mine. It feels like the very last piece of me.

And if I give up the last piece of me, then what will be left?